Transcribe Ward, Henry A. Letter to Orton, James (1855-10-31)

To my great disappointment I found that you had not arrived, and a letter ^from you^ the next day in a moment over- -threw all my bright hopes in relation to our presence this winter. You do not know, dear Orton, how great a disapoint- -ment this has been to me, especially since I have had a few days to realize it. I had felt from the first that there was an uncertainty about my seeing you this winter, but I had thought so many things which would be so pleasant if you did come, that I had that I had arrived insensibly at looking upon you as already here .I feel very much the need of a companion here at Paris. Of the immense ammount of things to be seen here I have as yet seen nothing, not even the Louvre, I love to see objects of interest, but not alone<.u>. I want some one to see them with me - one, who, a stranger like myself, can draw comparisons ^between^ with them & the institutions of an other country. I visited the "Exposition" once two months ago with Arthur Mitchell, and since that time I have postponed going in hopes of going with you. I want someone in my everyday life & studies to whom I can express my thoughts and hear theirs. I feel sometimes as if I <u>must have this. It is absolutely painful to be compelled to live beyond a certain extent within ones self. And permit me also to add, Orton, it is hard to live here in France without a single christian friend. Although surrounded by so much which is evil, in a city full of vice where the sabbath is not in the least respected and where there is virtually, almost no religion. I have not with standing been greatly blessed by the presence of God. But I feel as if all my attention was needed to keep my present ground, and that I shall never make any advancement while living thus alone.